I know, I know....I'm as sick of talking about this shit as anybody, but I figured I'd wrap my end of it up and then take a blessed Talk About Kratom sabbatical. By the way I still dunno how you prounounce it. Krattum? Crate 'em? I prefer to pronounce it the way a boolie in a grass skirt might invoke the name of the volcano his tribe worships - Kray-Tom, with the slight beat between syllables. After some sampling and experimenting, it appears that I'm a green-vein man, and that my sweet spot in right about half-a-tablespoon (what I'd presume is somewhere between 3½ & 4½ grams). Also discovered that kratom is not dose-dependent so much as it user dependent, which is both interesting and worrisome. For instance, a lot of people dose up with a cup of coffee, whereas I found caffeine to turn the whole buzz uncomfortably speedy. Fruit juice is likewise tricky....apple juice is okay, but the more acidic juices - especially pineapple - result in a head with a nasty, near-nauseous bottom right from the outset. On the other hand, the ideal mixer, hands down, is one of those Korean aloe vera drinks, with the chunks of aloe vera visibly floating in it - cut with a little spring water in a 60/40 mix. But all of this sort of 'information' is ultimately useless, as is everything else in this post, because ten people could try these strains of leaf listed below - and/or the mixers mentioned above - and have ten wildly differing reactions. One other discovery I made: you crash on kratom, and it's not some gentle blissful descent yada yada yada.....it's your standard crash with a slight chemical edge and the unpleasantness reminds you, the sales brochure of blissed out leafheads notwithstanding, this is a drug; you're on drugs. See? And this is how it feels when the drugs wear off. Anyhow, here's what I tried and what I think: Jungle Red Vein (Indo), Nomad: edgy and unpleasant at low doses; gritty/hairy and unpleasant at high doses. Gonna wait another ten days to give 'er one more shot before chucking, hope I didn't have her dialed in the first two times. Naturally this is the one I bought the most of (130+ grams!) Kali Kaya White Thai, MmmmSpec: Approached this cautiously, wary of pounding heart and restless leg, but turned out to be pretty nice: up, but with a calm kind of energy. Grade incomplete, though, because I made the grievous error of going out for my daily afternoon ride without checking or caring what the temps were, and I ended up riding 7 miles in a 100-plus-degree heat index, hyperventilating (and wanting badly to not be on kratom) the whole way. I'm going to assume that the brain-warping, baking-oven conditions did not give me an opportunity to judge the product fairly. Tawa Tuo Green Indo, MmmmSpec: Nice. Mellow, waves of contentment, understated energy, general happy-to-be-alive glow. Pretty much why I tried this stuff in the first place. Green Vein Indo, MmmmSpec free sample: Likewise: nice. The boost of energy isn't the grind-your-teeth sort and the euphoric properties nicely complement the subtle speediness of the head. Red Vein Indo, MmmmSpec free sample: Have yet to try it. I don't care if it's unimpressive, so long as it's not unpleasant/uncomfortable liker the other red. Frankly, though? Even the green-vein varieties, nice as they are, have that slightly unpleasant bottom to them that seems to be an unavoidable component of doing kratom. Any worries I might've had about picking up a habit are pretty much nonexistent because I can't see wanting to do this even three days in a row, never mind months at a clip. And the thought of returning to the kratom bag 2 and 3 times a day to maintain the high is something I won't be doing again any time soon, I assure you. It probably looks like I started this post all enthusiastic, and then talked myself out of my own enthusiasm, but that's not it. Kratom is for real, it definitely works - it gets you high - it's just the kind of high I don't wanna do more than 2 or 3 times a week at the absolute most. Probably a good thing I never did a deal with the Indonesian, because that 900 grams would probably outlast me. And now I am well and truly kratom'd out.